Short Funny Quotes

Short Funny Quotes

"I can resist everything except temptation."
Short funny quotes, Oscar Wilde.


"There are three faithful friends—an old wife, an old dog, and ready money."
Short funny quotes, Franklin.


"To cease smoking is the easiest thing. I ought to know. I've done it a thousand times."
Short funny quotes, Mark Twain.


"The direct use of force is such a poor solution to any problem, it is generally employed only by small children and large nations."
Short funny quotes, David Friedman.


"What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? Claustrophobic."
Short funny quotes, Unknown.


"I do not like broccoli. And I haven't liked it since I was a little kid and my mother made me eat it. And I'm President of the United States and I'm not going to eat any more broccoli."
Short funny quotes, George Bush.


"The shortest distance between two points is under construction."
Short funny quotes, Noelie Altito.


"Honolulu - it's got everything. Sand for the children, sun for the wife, sharks for the wife's mother."
Short funny quotes, Ken Dodd.


"One has fear in front of a goat, in back of a mule, and on every side of a fool"
Short funny quotes, Edgar Watson Howe.


"Love is grand; divorce is a hundred grand."
Short funny quotes, Unknown.


"My formula for success is rise early, work late, and strike oil."
Short funny quotes, Paul Getty.